Ever spent hours untangling yarn, frogging a project for the fifth time, or stabbing yourself with a crochet hook? Yeah, me too. That’s exactly why I designed this fuck crochet pillow pattern colorwork version—because sometimes, the only appropriate response to a dropped stitch or a tangled skein is a big ol’ FUCK.
This isn’t just a pillow; it’s a mood. A battle cry. A soft, squishy reminder that crafting can be both meditative and rage-inducing. Whether you’re rage-crocheting your way through life or just want to add a little subversive charm to your decor, this pattern has you covered. Grab your yarn, embrace the chaos, and let’s stitch some feelings into this bad boy.
For more silly crochet pillow patterns, check out these posts.
Here’s everything you need to create the Fuck crochet pillow
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Skill level
Advanced Beginner
Hook size
5mm crochet hook
Supplies
- 1 skein medium weight acrylic yarn in A (background color), at least 400 yards
- 200 yards in B (letters)
- Poly-fil or filling of your choice
Pattern notes
This pattern is written for right-handed crocheters in US terms. For left-handed crocheters, work each Row from end to beginning.
Abbreviations
- ch = chain stitch
- st= stitch
- sc= single crochet
Disclaimer: This pattern is intended for personal use only. Duplication of this pattern for sale or distribution is protected under copyright and are property of The Morning Crafter.
Stitch guide
- Single Crochet Stitch (sc) insert hook into stitch, pull through 1 loop (leaving 2 loops on the hook), yarn over, pull through both loops
- Color Changing: As you’re moving through a single crochet stitch, when you are left with the 2 loops on the hook, do not complete the stitch with your current color. Drop color 1, grab color two, pull that through the 2 loops on your hook and continue on to your next stitch with the new color. Seamless transition with no knots!
The chart
This pattern is worked in a front panel, and a back panel, which are joined after the back panel has been stitched together. It’s super important to reference this chart while stitching to ensure your letters come out correctly. That way, even if you accidentally add or subtract a stitch, your text will still line up. Outside of lining up your text, this pillow is super forgiving and customizable. If you accidentally end up with too many stitches, you can hide it when you stitch your two panels together.
Instructions
Front panel
Begin with: ch 66
Row 1: Starting in the 2nd ch from the hook, sc across the row in A, ch 1, turn (65)
Rows 2-11: sc in every stitch across the row in A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 12: sc 37 A, 4 B, 24 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 13: sc 23 A, 6 B, 36 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 14: sc 36 A, 3 B, 2 A, 2 B, 22 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 15: sc 21 A, 3 B, 2 A, 3 B, 36 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 16: sc 15 A, 3 B, 18 A, 3 B, 3 A, 2 B, 21 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 17: sc 20 A, 2 B, 4 A, 3 B, 17 A, 2 B, 1 A, 1 B, 15 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 18: sc 15 A, 1 B, 1 A, 2 B, 18 A, 3 B, 3 A, 3 B, 19 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 19: sc 19 A, 2 B, 4 A, 2 B, 18 A, 2 B, 1 A, 2 B, 15 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 20: sc 15 A, 2 B, 1 A, 2 B, 18 A, 3 B, 3 A, 3 B, 18 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 21: sc 17 A, 3 B, 4 A, 2 B, 18 A, 5 B, 16 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 22: sc 17 A, 4 B, 18 A, 3 B, 3 A, 3 B, 17 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 23: sc 16 A, 3 B, 3 A, 3 B, 19 A, 8 B, 13 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 24: sc 13 A, 2 B, 2 A, 5 B, 2 A, 4 B, 13 A, 3 B, 2 A, 3 B, 16 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 25: sc 12 A, 7 B, 1 A, 3 B, 7 A, 2 B, 4 A, 2 B, 1 A, 2 B, 2 A, 4 B, 3 A, 2 B, 13 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 26: sc 13 A, 3 B, 3 A, 3 B, 5 A, 2 B, 4 A, 3 B, 3 A, 1 B, 3 A, 8 B, 1 A, 2 B, 11 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 27: sc 10 A, 3 B, 1 A, 6 B, 4 A, 2 B, 3 A, 3 B, 3 A, 3 B, 4 A, 4 B, 2 A, 3 B, 14 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 28: sc 16 A, 7 B, 4 A, 3 B, 3 A, 3 B, 3 A, 2 B, 4 A, 9 B, 11 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 29: sc 14 A, 3 B, 1 A, 3 B, 2 A, 3 B, 2 A, 4 B, 3 A, 3 B, 3 A, 7 B, 17 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 30: sc 10 A, 2 B, 4 A, 9 B, 1 A, 5 B, 2 A, 5 B, 1 A, 3 B, 1 A, 3 B, 2 A, 4 B, 13 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 31: sc 13 A, 4 B, 2 A, 3 B, 1 A, 3 B, 1 A, 8 B, 1 A, 5 B, 1 A, 3 B, 1 A, 4 B, 2 A, 2 B, 11 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 32: sc 11 A, 7 B, 2 A, 3 B, 1 A, 4 B, 3 A, 4 B, 1 A, 5 B, 2 A, 3 B, 3 A, 3 B, 13 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 33: sc 13 A, 3 B, 4 A, 3 B, 2 A, 3 B, 20 A, 4 B, 13 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 34: sc 42 A, 3 B, 4 A, 3 B, 13 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 35: sc 12 A, 4 B, 4 A, 3 B, 42 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 36: sc 42 A, 3 B, 4 A, 4 B, 12 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 37: sc 12 A, 4 B, 4 A, 3 B, 42 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 38: sc 42 A, 3 B, 4 A, 4 B, 12 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 39: sc 13 A, 3 B, 3 A, 4 B, 42 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 40: sc 43 A, 3 B, 3 A, 3 B, 13 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 41: sc 13 A, 3 B, 2 A, 3 B, 44 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 42: sc 44 A, 7 B, 14 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 43: sc 15 A, 4 B, 46 A, ch 1, turn (65)
Row 44- 55: sc in every stitch across the row in A, ch 1, turn (65)
After Row 55, tie off.
Back panel
Begin with: ch 66 in A
Row 1: Starting in the 2nd ch from the hook, sc across the row in A, ch 1, turn (65)
Rows 2-55: sc in every stitch across the row in A, ch 1, turn (65)
At the end of row 55, do NOT tie off.
Joining the pieces
Keeping your hook on the last ch stitch, insert your hook into the bottom corner of your front panel. In each row across, insert hook through next stitch in back AND front panel, joining them with a sc stitch. continue to the corner.
When you get to the end of that first row, sc 4 times in corner, turn your work and continue sc in each stitch on back and front panel along the side. Sc 4 times in top corner, continue stitching along the top of your pillow, sc 4 times in corner, stitch about 1/2 way down final side.
Stuff pillow to personal puffiness preference. Once stuffed to your liking, continue on the final side to seal up your pillow. Sc 3 times in the final corner.
Tie off. Tuck in any leftover strings from your project, and VOILA! You did it!
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